{"product_id":"absolutely-feral-t-shirt","title":"Absolutely Feral T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSome creatures choose chaos. Some are simply born bouncing. \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAbsolutely Feral\u003c\/strong\u003e takes the language of a dire warning and applies it to one of nature’s least convincing threats: an absurdly happy baby goat. Mid-hop, bell swinging, and apparently delighted with whatever bad decision comes next, this tiny menace has all the restraint you’d expect from something that just discovered it has legs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eRendered in the strange, weathered \u003cstrong\u003eDARKLORE™\u003c\/strong\u003e style, the design pairs oversized hostile Gothic lettering with a distressed bone-white goat that physically disappears into ragged negative space. A muted rust-red collar and bell provide the lone accent, giving the piece the appearance of some ancient warning about a creature considerably more dangerous than the evidence suggests.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDetails\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOriginal Hard Mode IRL \u003cstrong\u003eDARKLORE™\u003c\/strong\u003e design\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOversized “ABSOLUTELY FERAL” Gothic typography\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePlayful baby goat captured mid-hop\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDistressed bone-white illustration with disappearing negative-space detail\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMuted rust-red collar and bell accent\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDark folklore styling with deadpan, absurdist humor\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDesigned for animal lovers, chaos enthusiasts, and anyone whose energy exceeds their threat level\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePremium unisex fit designed for comfortable everyday wear\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eTiny hooves. 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